At the very beginning of your separation journey, you wouldn’t have been able to even imagine taking the plunge and trying your hand at love again. We told you at the beginning of your family law matter that we believe there can be a really awesome side to separation, we asked you to trust us on that one. You’re here because you’ve caught a glimpse of some of the good stuff that you hoped would be ahead for you when you decided to separate from your former partner. Now though, you need to figure out how to tell your kids that you’ve met someone.
My role in a person’s separation is a specific one, I am not an expert on all things social sciences but I do often field questions that relate to them. At BFLC, we believe our client’s need a team around them to work through their separation. Instead of trying to wear a hat that’s far better suited to one of your other team members, I’ve compiled a list of resources below to help you navigate this tricky milestone-
The Importance of Getting it Right
Sydney Couples & Family Specialists, a co-op of child experts, published a list of the key things they’ve heard from children after being introduced to a parent’s new partner. Read here to learn direct from the source just how impactful this moment can be.
Planting the Seed
Better Relationships, am arm of the hugely important Anglicare, speaks on the crucial step of discussing the idea of your new relationship long before any meeting takes place, they say that some serious prep time is needed, you can read more about planting the seed here.
The Whole Thing
Dr Justin Coulson was interviewed by Kidspot on this very topic and helpfully came up with a 12-step process of tacking the whole thing, it is essential reading and you can find it here.
When the Shoe is on the Other Foot
Relate, the leading relationships NGO for the UK, takes things a little further and provides some tips to cope when you are on the other side of things, and your former partner is inviting your kids to meet their new partner. Importantly, how you behave in this situation can be hugely impactful for your children. Read more here.
It’s no easy feat, but with the right research and support (including from your counsellor or psychologist and certainly with the same support for your kids) you can all sail through this milestone and beyond.